[tempo starts: 110 BPM, mandolin strumming quick and steady] [drumbeat enters: rhythmic and driving, with a playful bounce] **(Verse 1)** [mandolin leads, vocals quick and sly] Oh, I’ve got a plan, it’s clever and grand, With a sack of flour in my hand. The rogue’s in place, the dice will fly, We’ll sneak attack ‘til the bad guys cry! [flute joins: playful and jaunty, weaving between the lines] Invisible swords? Oh, that’s my style, A sphere of darkness to make them beguile. The DM groans, but I just grin, For the rules are clear—I’m gonna win! **(Chorus)** [all instruments swell, vocals loud and triumphant] Oh, I’m the sneak attack king, the master of the game, With loopholes and rulings, I’ll stake my claim! From invisible blades to a saw of steel, I’ll break the rules—but it’s all legit, for real! **(Verse 2)** [mandolin and drumbeat drive the rhythm, vocals quick and cheeky] Oh, the jail was locked, the bars were tight, But my adamantine saw made it right. “I checked the rules,” I proudly said, “And it cuts through iron, just like I read!” [fiddle joins, adding a lively, mischievous melody] The guards were blinded, the rogue took aim, And rolled a crit—it’s always the same. With a sack of flour, I spoiled their stealth, But it gave us the edge, and we claimed the wealth! **(Chorus)** [all instruments return, fuller and more raucous] Oh, I’m the sneak attack king, the master of the game, With loopholes and rulings, I’ll stake my claim! From invisible blades to a saw of steel, I’ll break the rules—but it’s all legit, for real! **(Bridge)** [tempo slows, mandolin strums softly, vocals exaggerated and dramatic] Oh, the DM sighs, the party cheers, For my cunning plans have spanned the years. I’ll cite the page, I’ll quote the text, And leave the enemies thoroughly vexed. [tempo builds, instruments layering back in] For every rule has a loophole to find, And every fight needs a brilliant mind. I’ll bend the game, but I won’t break, And I’ll always roll for the party’s sake! **(Final Chorus)** [all instruments return, faster and more chaotic, vocals triumphant] Oh, I’m the sneak attack king, the master of the game, With loopholes and rulings, I’ll stake my claim! From invisible blades to a saw of steel, I’ll break the rules—but it’s all legit, for real! [tempo slows dramatically, vocals exaggerated and drawn out] Oh, the sneak… attack… kiiiiiing! [tempo suddenly jumps back up, full band stomping and clapping] And the master of ruliiiiings! **(Outro)** [mandolin and flute trade playful riffs, fading out gradually] So here’s to the player who bends the game, With cunning and wit, they’ve earned their fame. For every party needs a mind so keen, To turn chaos into a perfect scene. [end with a final mandolin flourish and a hearty laugh from the band] ---
