[Verse] I woke up Monday morning, Stepped outside my house. There was a goose upon my lawn Standing proud and stout. I tried to walk around him. He simply shook his head. Then somehow I apologized And slowly backed away instead. [Chorus] The goose runs this town, The goose runs this town. Nobody knows when it happened, But the goose runs this town. The mayor's got a fancy office, The sheriff wears a crown. But everybody answers to the goose That runs this town. [Verse] The baker gives him free baguettes. The banker gives him loans. The crossing guard lets traffic stop Whenever he just honks. The local news reports his moods. The weather follows suit. Last week he glared at a thunderstorm And somehow it rerouted. [Chorus] The goose runs this town, The goose runs this town. I used to think democracy Was how things all went down. Now every law and policy Gets pecked before it's found. Everybody knows who's really boss— The goose that runs this town. [Bridge] I tried to challenge his authority. It did not go well. He stared at me for seven seconds, And my confidence just fell. Then he stole my sandwich, My bicycle, My hat. And somehow charged me twelve bucks To get all three things back. [Breakdown] HONK! Town meeting! HONK! Budget cuts! HONK! New regulations! HONK! Good luck! No parking on the west side. No singing after three. And every household owes exactly One emergency loaf of bread weekly. [Verse] Tourists come from miles around To witness his regime. The goose now has a statue And a surprisingly good public relations team. Schoolchildren learn his biography. The anthem's mostly quacks. And every year on Founder's Day The goose collects a tax. [Final Chorus] The goose runs this town, The goose runs this town. At first I fought the system, Now I'm helping write it down. The goose runs this town, And honestly somehow, Things have never worked much better Since the goose took over town. [Outro] This message was approved By the Office of the Goose. Failure to enjoy this song May result in aggressive honking. Thank you for your cooperation. HONK.
