He roams the highways, up and down His nose filled with dust and wonder So many paws have asked before: "What the hell did Heaven make us for?" He sniffs behind every fence he sees But never finds that grand decree No bone, no philosophy Explains what a dog's life ever could forgive [Chorus] So he sets out to classify The landfills of this world, beneath the sky A Grade One for the stench, a Grade Two for the gleam A Grade Three if old sausage casings still hold a dream Perhaps that is his purpose—who can say? The stray dog and his landfill classification [Verse 2] There’s the quiet dump deep in the woods Where the moonlight glints off tin cans and goods He gives it a "Very Romantic—a Ten!" Because the rats walk softly right alongside him then Then the big one near the town—Category A With its sickly-sweet, pungent carrion café He grades them strictly by finds, by shine, and by grub And realizes: Maybe this searching is actually fun [Chorus] And so he classifies the dumps within his domain A Grade One for the stench, a Grade Two for the gleam A Grade Three if old sausage casings still hold a dream Perhaps that is his purpose—who can say? The Stray and the Dump Classification [Bridge – slow, thoughtful] He never found the meaning of a dog's life No wise saying, no deep reason But every time he sees a new dump He silently notes: "Category B – smells good, almost like a song" And somewhere deep in his dog's chest A little word beats: "Maybe this is what you're looking for." [Chorus – quieter, with a smile] Yes, he classifies the world's garbage dumps Because he simply enjoys the act of sorting A grade of one for the stench, a grade of two for the shimmer A grade of three if old sausage casings still remember something Perhaps that's his purpose – so wonderfully quirky The stray and his garbage dump classification game [Outro – spoken or whispered, guitar riff] Perhaps that's what he's looking for… [The clink of a can, a distant dog's howl]
