He puts ads in my start menu But he does it 'cause he cares He restarts me without warning 'Cause he knows what's best in there Copilot watches everything I do That's just love, that's nothing new I know he tracks my location too But he's always been there for me People say "just leave him" Easy for them to say They don't understand our history We've been together forty years today Forty years in the blue screen light Thought the cage was mine by right He sold me the lock and he sold me the key Called it Windows, called it free And I can't unsee it Can't unsee it anymore Sure he needs a Microsoft account Just to let me use MY files And the telemetry's a little much But he smiles such a friendly smile Game Pass offer during setup One Drive pushing every day Edge keeps coming back from the dead Like he never went away But everyone uses Windows! It's the only way to live! My grandma uses Windows! It's the only thing I— Forty years in the blue screen light Thought the cage was mine by right He sold me the lock and he sold me the key Called it Windows, called it free And I can't unsee it Can't unsee it anymore Then HP left a door open Just sitting there Unlocked I told myself don't look I looked It boots in fifteen seconds No account No ads No Copilot staring at me like a disappointed parent Five year old laptop running like it's brand new And I just stood there Like an idiot Forty years An absolute idiot Now Dell is doing the math And ASUS made a list Lenovo's checking exit clauses In contracts Microsoft can't resist The other hostages are watching Seeing if I make it out alive Microsoft is kicking, screaming "You need me just to survive!" Forty years in the blue screen light Thought the cage was mine by right You sold me the lock AND you sold me the key That's not love, that's captivity And I can't unsee it Won't unsee it DONE unsee it Anymore He'll find someone else to update Someone new to restart at 3am Someone who still believes the taskbar ads Are there to help them Poor bastard
