[Verse 1] It started with a brown — just a tactile little bump Now I've got forty boards and my wallet took a dump Cherry, Gateron, Kailh — I know every single spring I can tell you actuation force like it's a holy thing [Chorus] Click click clack clack — I can't go back! Mech keyboard addiction and my bank account is cracked Click click clack clack — another group buy trap I don't need another board... but have you FELT this thiccccc thock? [Verse 2] I split my board in half, said it's "better for my wrists" Now I'm typing on an ErgoDox like an ergo priest Lily, Iris, Corne — yeah I solder them for fun My brain says "pick a keyboard" — but my hands say "which one?" [Verse 3] I got layers on my layers, QMK on track Macro on my pinky sends "I'm busy" straight to Slack Hold-tap, mod-tap, leader key combos stacked My spacebar does eleven things — I forgot how to type on Mac [Chorus] Click click clack clack — I can't go back! Mech keyboard addiction and my bank account is cracked Click click clack clack — another group buy trap I don't need another board... but have you FELT this thiccccc thock? [Bridge — slower, dramatic] Red for linear... smooth like butter on a rail Blue for clicky... yeah my coworkers want me jailed Jade for MAXIMUM click — sounds like hail inside a tin Purple, yellow, white — I have tried them ALL and I'll try them all again Full sculpted SA — old-school IBM vibes, baby DSA boring flats — for the simple life, maybe Cherry, OEM, MT3 — I own every single mold KAT, XDA, who asked? — Every profile is gold [Verse 4] RGB on everything — my desk looks like a rave I've got under-glow, per-key-glow, I'm RGB's slave Custom caps in GMK, six months on a wait list Two hundred bucks for plastic squares — I am a mech masochist [Verse 5 — softer, dreamy] Don't talk to me, I'm typing... this is my ASMR Every keystroke is a tingle, every thock a little star Eyes closed, sound test rolling — fifty words a minute healing If you don't get it, you don't get it — this is more than just a feeling [Outro — spoken, deadpan over fading clicks] I just need one more board. Maybe a 40%. Or a macropad. Does a macropad count? ...it doesn't count.
