No Pretend💔

I wanted to be clean for once not good, not graceful, just wanted under a sunny sky that couldn’t decide on a color. Sunscreen mixed with my perfume, heat rising from the love song you left behind. The train ride was long, you were done with girls, and I couldn’t say “me” without tasting how stupid that sounded. Tenderness was miles off, probably stuck somewhere near Jersey City. You should have messaged, even if it meant nothing. Even if all it did was ruin someone else’s plans. Baby we would’ve been so odd anyway just strangers meeting by accident, laughing like we meant it. Walking nowhere with the wrong intentions No one would know, nobody could see We could have just pretended. Sunset bent through a bottle the kind of warm that feels like forgetting. You said the movie was garbage, but I liked that the monster came back just to try again. He didn't ask if it made sense. I smelled like beach and coco butter for days. Still do, sometimes. There’s a part of me that only speaks in missed messages and overexposed film. (baby you should’ve tried…) We weren’t even an us Not really. But we almost were that version of the story where we walk too far and end up where we didn’t mean to go. The movie monster lifts his stupid head again. I wave. I leave before he finishes the scene. This time, I go on my own. This time, there’s no pretend. (no pretend, baby no pretend…)