To the tune of "Shchedryk", a famous traditional Ukarainian folk song, known more globally as "Carol of the Bells". This is a parody take on that song and is about all the stress inducing aspects of the holidays. Hope your Christmas is Merrier than this song. Enjoy! 🎄🌟🎁🙏😁🤪 ------------------------------------------------- [Short Instrumental bells Intro] [Verse 1] Shop, shop, and shop, Why did I come? Parking lot war Circled three times I’ve lost my spot Crowds in the lot Lights everywhere People who stare- [Verse 2] Crowds, crowds, and crowds, Bodies collide, Carts in my shins Lines never end Aisles are blocked (by) Couples who stop (to) Debate for so long Which candle they want- [Verse 3] Buy, buy, and buy, Wallet says “No,” Swipe it again, Please don’t decline— Oh, sale tag lies, That deal’s for apps, Memberships, points, And rudeness on tap- [Verse 4] IKEA run Welcome to maze, Can't find my kids It’s been three says. Best, Best, and Buy, Blue shirts appear, Can't help me now Anger is near- [Chorus] Gifts, gifts, and gifts, Pressure exists, More, more, and more, What is this for? Joy is buried under the lists ‘Tis the season to be stressed. Merry, merry, merry, friggin Christmas Merry, merry, merry, friggin Christmas [Verse 5] Drive, drive, and drive, Traffic won’t move, Red lights won't change They’re mocking you. Someone cuts in, Then flips me off, Peace on earth Is officially dead- [Verse 6] Wrap, wrap, and wrap, Tape stuck to me, Scissors are gone Since 2003. What did I buy? Who is this for? Why do I have Rubber Ducks galore?- [Verse 7] Oh no, Oh no, Duplicate gifts, Two of the same From Carol and Chris. Stand in returns, Receipt in despair, Line says “Express,” It's really not- [Verse 8] Click, click, and click, Return and refund, Print label out, Stand by the door, “Delivered” it says, But porch pirates roam It just is gone It just is gone- [Final Chorus] Bills, bills, and bills, Budget is wrecked, Spend, spend, and spend, Just to feel “in” All of this stress for gifts we’ll forget Next year I’m giving cash or regret. Merry, merry, merry, friggin Christmas Merry, merry, merry, friggin Christmas [Outro - fast & chaotic, but slowing at end] Shop, drive, and wrap, Cry on repeat, Smile for photos, Fake joy, sore feet. Fa-la-la-la— Please make it stop, Please make it stop- [slowing] Merry, merry, merry, friggin Christmas Merry, merry, merry, friggin Christmas [slowly] Ding, Dong, Ding, I need a nap-
