[Verse 1] I walked in, said a couple words, Didn't think they'd make the room erupt. Somebody heard what somebody heard, Next thing I know, everybody's up. I played one song on the jukebox, Thought it'd be a little harmless fun. Now somebody's yelling at somebody's brother, And everybody's pointing at someone. [Pre-Chorus] Now they're looking at me like I pulled the pin, Like I knew exactly how this would end. I gotta say, I'm flattered by the accusation— But let's get one thing straight... [Chorus] Who threw the chair? Wasn't me, I swear! I just said a little something, Now there's furniture in the air. Who threw the chair? Man, give me some credit there! If I planned all this chaos, I'd have charged admission at the door somewhere. Thank you for the compliment, But I promise I didn't plan— I just struck a little match And everybody brought the gasoline in their hands. [Verse 2] I mentioned something somebody did, That somebody told somebody else. By the time it made it halfway around, It had turned into something else. I put a record on the stereo, One little chorus hit just right. Now two old friends are settling twenty years Of arguments tonight. [Pre-Chorus] They're saying, "You knew what you were doing!" Like I'm some kind of mastermind. Man, if I'm really this intelligent, Why'd I leave my keys behind? [Chorus] Who threw the chair? Wasn't me, I swear! I just said a little something, Now there's furniture in the air. Who threw the chair? Man, give me some credit there! If I planned all this chaos, I'd have charged admission at the door somewhere. Thank you for the compliment, But I promise I didn't plan— I just struck a little match And everybody brought the gasoline in their hands. [Bridge / Breakdown] I didn't start the fight— I just said, "Are we gonna talk about that?" I didn't pick the fight— I just pressed play on the track. I didn't throw the bottle, I didn't break the glass, I didn't move the table— I just happened to be standing where it happened! WHO THREW THE CHAIR?! Not me! WHO THREW THE CHAIR?! I don't know! WHO THREW THE CHAIR?! Ask that guy! WHO THREW THE CHAIR?! Why's everybody looking at me?! [Final Chorus] Who threw the chair? Wasn't me, I swear! I just opened up my mouth And suddenly we're fighting everywhere. Who threw the chair? Yeah, I appreciate the flair! You think I'm some evil genius With a master plan prepared. Thank you for the credit, But I promise I didn't plan— I just said what everybody thought And let the chaos take my hand. So if anybody asks me How the whole thing got so wild— I'll tell you what I told 'em... "I don't know who threw the chair..." ...but it sure wasn't me. [Outro] Well... I did pick the song. But that ain't the same thing. Right?
