Dear Journal.. It’s 3:33 Again Funny Everybody tells you to speak your truth Until your truth makes them uncomfortable This one This isn’t for Jay Or K2 Or my family Or the people who actually know my heart This one’s for everybody else Respectfully If you hear yourself in this song That’s between you and your conscience Not me I’ve spent years Shrinking myself To make other people comfortable Changing my tone Choosing softer words Smiling when I wanted to scream Apologizing For surviving things You couldn’t even imagine I’m tired Not tired of living Tired of pretending I’m not carrying A backpack Full of yesterdays Every zipper’s busted Every pocket’s heavy And somehow You still expect me To carry yours too Absolutely not You took my silence As permission You took my kindness As weakness You took my healing Personally That’s not my problem That’s yours Respectfully Go ahead Be offended Wear the shoe If it fits I’m done carrying The weight Of how you choose To hear my truth Respectfully I’m climbing my mountain Whether you clap Or curse my name This song Isn’t revenge It’s release I’m setting down What never belonged On my shoulders Your opinions Your assumptions Your projections Take them back I’ve got enough weight In this backpack already And somehow I’m still climbing Still breathing Still showing up That says more about me Than your comments Ever will Maybe I’ll never post this Maybe it stays Right here Between me And these pages But even if Nobody hears it I needed to Because healing Isn’t always quiet Sometimes It sounds like Finally saying No Respectfully I’m done apologizing For telling my story If my truth Feels like an attack Maybe ask yourself why I’m not turning around I’m not unpacking My backpack Full of yesterdays I’m just Putting one foot In front of the other And I’m going to keep climbing This mountain With Or without Your permission Dear Journal I don’t owe everybody A softer version of myself Love Kay
