“The ” (A Canadian fiddle-folk satire about Trump’s “Annexation Aspirations”) Well Trump looked north and waved his hand, Said, “Canada’s next—gonna grab that land!” Said, “You’ve got syrup and moose and snow— But what you need is a Mar-a-Lago show!” [Chorus – Group harmony, with a clap-along vibe] Oh no, Donny, that ain’t polite, We’ve got Tim Hortons and universal rights! You can keep your walls and MAGA hats— We’re busy curling and chillin’ with our cats! [Verse 2 – Banjo joins in] He said, “You’ve got oil, I’ve got deals,” “But not enough trucks with gold hubcap wheels!” “Let’s add a Trump Tower to Banff and Whistler— And rename Niagara ‘The Trump Sprinkler!’” [Bridge – Spoken interlude with fiddle flourish] But from Saskatoon to St. John’s Bay, The Mounties laughed and said, “Go away.” “We’re peaceful folks, but let’s be clear— The only thing you’re annexing is a beer.” [Verse 3 – Harmonica & fiddle duet] “You call our prime minister ‘weak and thin,’ Yet your hairpiece keeps blowin’ in the wind!” You say, “Make Canada the 51st state,” We say, “Sorry, no thanks—go tweet your own fate.” [Final Chorus – Full Canadian folk band energy] So no, Donny, we’re fine up here, We like our winters, our lakes, our beer. Keep your drama, your caps, your gold estate— Canada’s cool, we’re not your 51st state! [Sing-Along Outro – Bouncy folk rhythm] So pack up your toupee and your fancy steak, We’ve got moose to kiss and ice to break! Try to take us, we’ll just say “Nah,” Go build your wall around Arkansas! We’re nice, not nuts—don’t get confused, Our poutine’s hot and we’re slightly amused. So march on back with your golden plate— 'Cause Canada’s full—and we shut the gate!
