Black River

[Verse 1] I wrote my name in rust On the back of that truck stop bill Paid for my sins in cash And a bottle that wouldn't still Mama kept a picture Of me with my church shoes clean Now it's folded in a drawer Like a note from a bad dream [Verse 2] I left a wife in winter Left her staring at the stove Said I'd come back different I came back just to go Every town I slept in Got a little more like hell Every hand I shook for mercy Pulled a ring of blood from my belt [Verse 3] There's a creek behind the pasture Where the mud won't hold your weight I went there with my old coat And my father's pocket knife Thought about the river Thought about a kinder end But the dark kept calling louder Than the voice I used to have [Bridge] Now the house is full of silence And the walls know what I've done There's a wind in every doorway Like it wants to drag me on If I kneel, it ain't for saving If I pray, it ain't for pride I'm just counting up the wreckage One last time before I die [Verse 4] So if you find me faded By that blackwater edge Tell her I was sorry Tell her I meant what I said Tell my boy I loved him Though I loved him like a thief And the worst of all my living Was the way I came to grief