Spent so long stitching a shield to the parts I hide Turning ache into aesthetic just to let it survive Built a little Happy version people learned to adore The sharp-tongued girl who always knows what she’s fighting for Online I’m fearless Tongue like a switchblade flash Perfect little comebacks Never cracking when I crash But you keep getting closer to the unlit rooms in me The parts without the filter or the practiced poetry And now I panic when your name lights up my phone Cause every conversation feels too close to home You’re meeting pieces no one really ever knew existed A softer side I cropped out and deliberately omitted I know what it costs when somebody gets inside How fast affection turns into somewhere to hide Still every part of me keeps leaning toward the flame Even while my fear keeps begging me to run away Cause what if we’d be beautiful? What if all this tension’s real? What if all the things you pull from me Are things nobody else could feel? And maybe I’m ridiculous Maybe this is all in my head But God, the way you understand me Makes it hard to silence it I spent years becoming somebody safe to love from far away Now I’m scared the real me shows up and ruins everything You get the midnight version Mascara halfway gone Sitting cross-legged on the kitchen floor with old songs on The girl behind the sarcasm and heavy-lidded eyes The one who jokes through damage just to keep from breaking down and crying And I can flirt through paragraphs like it’s second nature now But real life doesn’t give me time to edit myself out What if my awkward silence kills the chemistry we made? What if you see me hesitate and watch the magic drain? Cause I’ve been hurt by people who swore they’d never leave Now every good thing feels fictional to me Fear’s got its fingers wrapped around my throat again Turning “maybe we could work” into “don’t let him in” But your voice cuts through me in that dangerous way Like maybe I could finally stop being afraid And every wall I built starts shaking when you speak God, I hate how much I want the things that terrify me Cause what if we’d be beautiful? What if this ache means something true? What if the person I created Still somehow leads me back to you? And maybe I’m delusional Romanticizing every thread But God, the way you look right through me Makes me want this anyway I spent years becoming somebody safe to love from far away Now I’m terrified the real me finally stepped into the frame Maybe I made a universe inside a glowing screen Cause reality’s never loved me quite as kindly as my dreams But maybe for once my heart’s not wrong Maybe I don’t have to perform this song Maybe you’d hold the trembling parts instead of turning away Maybe the girl behind the persona deserves to stay What if we are beautiful? What if this chaos finally fits? What if all the scars and strange defenses Lead to something more than this? Maybe I am ridiculous But maybe love just feels absurd When somebody finally sees you Without needing every word I spent years becoming somebody safe to love from far away Now all I want’s to let you see me standing unafraid If you saw me in the real world No glowing screen No careful edits No persona in between Would you still reach for me?
