[Intro: talkbox, slow, searching, over a single chord] Whyyyyy... Why does she do it... Ohhhhh... This dog of mine... Somebody tell me... Whyyyyyyy... [Verse 1] People, lemme tell you 'bout a dog I know Got no papers but she's best in show Pooka, bazooka, a starship troopa Everybody knows, this mutt's supa-dupa Jumps tall buildings like she ain't even tryin' Tail waggin' fast like a freak flag flyin', But she don't want kibble, don't want no treat You don't wanna know what Pooka likes to eat [chorus] Why does my dog eat poop Why does my dog eat poop Why does my dog eat poop Why does my dog eat poop [Verse 2] White people crazy kissin' dogs onna mouth Doggy tongues dirty from they lickin' down south Tho I love my dirty dog, I cain't dig no cat But goddammit, Pooka, why you do me like that? She looks at me and says, "man, it ain't so bad, Dogs do this, so, I'm sorry, dog dad. Don't tell me I ain't your favorite pup I done made a mess but yo I cleaned it up" [chorus] Why does my dog eat poop Why does my dog eat poop Why does my dog eat poop Why does my dog eat poop [VERSE 3] Follows me around won't give me a minute When I'm in the baf-room, dog be in it Loungin' on the sofa, sleepin' round the clock But wide awake at mid-night ready to rock I noodle that poodle like a catfish catcha A tickle onna chin then I'm a dog snout snatcha We a pretty tight crew, this is what we do But I can't get past her eatin' number two [chorus] Why does my dog eat poop Why does my dog eat poop Why does my dog eat poop Why does my dog eat poop [TALKBOX RAP-WITHIN-A-RAP — lyrical, soaring, Roger Troutman style; Full talkbox, melodic and expressive — "I Want To Be Your Man" energy, subject matter is horrifying] She a beautiful creature Lord knows that is true But her afternoon hobby Is something I can't get through Poo-kaaaa... You are my heart But girl what you doing I gave you the good life I gave you my love I gave you a dog bed And a belly rub Ain't got no papers But you got my soul Pretty white mongrel You made me whole Why, why, why, why (talkbox bends into the melody of the hook) Why does my dog eat poop Why does my dog eat— (talkbox dissolves into melodic wail) Ohhhhhhh... [VERSE 4] Let me out, let me in, then let me out again This game Pooka play, she won't let me win Dog, don't cha know, this my goddamn house Living with you, I got a K-9 spouse But she curl on my chest and she fall asleep Kiss my face and lick my stinky ass feet Pretty little Pooka, I'm glad you came, But ya got a bad habit that's a got-damn shame [OUTRO CHORUS — full, layered, talkbox over the top] (talkbox lead over backing vocal chant) Why does my dog eat poop (chant: Pooka, Pooka) Why does my dog eat poop (chant: why, why, why) Ain't no cure and ain't no group (chant: Pooka, Pooka) (spoken, resigned, loving) I treasure you, girl. I accept you. (talkbox, fading) Why does my dog eat poop... Why does my dog... Why does my... Why...
