I woke up this mornin’, rooster called in sick, Said he needs a raise and a microphone real quick. My dog’s on the porch wearin’ my best hat, He says he’s runnin’ for mayor — imagine that. My cow’s in the driveway blockin’ my truck, Chewin’ on a stop sign for a little good luck. I asked my mule why he’s wearin’ shades, He said, “Too many selfies in the pasture these days.” Chorus My tractor thinks it’s famous, signs autographs in mud, Revvin’ up the engine like a Hollywood stud. The chickens start screamin’ when it rolls on by, Swear it winked at the barn and flipped its headlights high. If country life’s a circus, I must be the clown, ‘Cause even my scarecrow’s tryin’ to run this town. My grandma baked a pie that could bench-press me, Flexed that crust like it had a gym membership fee. My fence fell over just for the view, Said it needed “better angles” like influencers do. The corn in the field started doin’ the wave, Every single kernel tryin’ to misbehave. My boots walked off, said they’re tired of my feet, Found ‘em two-steppin’ down Main Street. Chorus My tractor thinks it’s famous, honks instead of moos, Got a fan club made of cows in fancy shoes. It posted a photo with the caption “Hay!”, Now the sheep keep shoutin’, “Sign my bale today!” If country life’s a circus, I must be the clown, Even my mailbox keeps lettin’ folks down. The barn threw a party, didn’t tell me a thing, Hay bales harmonizin’ like they’re tryin’ to sing. My overalls shrunk just outta spite, Said, “We’re goin’ on strike till you wash us right.” I tried to be serious, stand up tall and proud, But my shadow tripped me right in front of the crowd. Chorus My tractor thinks it’s famous, got glitter on the tires, Says it’s droppin’ mixtapes and spittin’ barnyard fire. The pigs wear sunglasses, actin’ too cool, While the ducks form a band callin’ me a fool. If country life’s a circus, I’ll take the crown, ‘Cause my tractor just asked me to mow it down.
