Parody and Tribute of "Jolene" ©copyright 1973 by Dolly Parton / Velvet Apple Music [Spoken Intro — over quiet guitar] I went down to JoAnn’s today. Doors were locked. Sign was gone. And I still need three yards of batting. [Chorus] JoAnn, JoAnn, JoAnn, JoAnn I’m beggin’ you, please don’t take my crafts JoAnn, JoAnn, JoAnn, JoAnn Please don’t make me buy my yarn online [Verse 1] Your fabric stretched from wall to wall With bolts of every kind and all And aisles of beads in every shade of green Your coupons made my spirits sing Forty percent off everything Oh, nothing else could quite compare, JoAnn [Verse 2] I dream about you in my sleep Of yarn and felt piled six feet deep I wake up crying out your name, JoAnn And I can’t seem to understand Where else I'll get my floral strands Or googly eyes for half the price, JoAnn [Chorus] JoAnn, JoAnn, JoAnn, JoAnn Why did you leave me with no crafts? JoAnn, JoAnn, JoAnn, JoAnn Where am I supposed to buy my yarn? [Verse 3] I still have projects left to do A wreath, a quilt, a tutu too And half a knitted llama, JoAnn I had to have this talk with you My hot-glue gun depends on you Now what am I supposed to glue, JoAnn? [Final Chorus] JoAnn, JoAnn, JoAnn, JoAnn I’m beggin’ you, please don’t take my crafts JoAnn, JoAnn, JoAnn, JoAnn I’ve got one coupon left, it’s all I have [Outro] JoAnn... JoAnn... My coupon expired. JoAnn...
