[Verse 1: Alpine yodel male lead, proud and loud over a stomping kick and big cowbells] Hoi, I threw a farmer flat onto his back in the sawdust ring Then I threw his bigger brother, and the whole valley started to sing In the burlap shorts you grab the other by the belt and by the seat Six rounds of pure stubborn till the last man's off his feet I'm a plumber's kid from Zurich with a neck like a fence post And I beat the mountain boys at the one thing they love the most Then the mayor led my prize out with a garland on its head Not a trophy, not an envelope, a bull, the paper said Eight hundred kilos, swingin' cowbell, nostrils like a train And I live four floors up in the city, now explain that to my brain [Hook: Alpine yodel male lead, full stomp, alphorn riff] Grabbed him by the horns, holadi, and I took the bull home Up the elevator, past the neighbors, down the hallway on my own Now he's eatin' all the houseplants, and he's sleepin' in my bed I took the bull by the horns, and now the bull is takin' me instead [Verse 2: Female Alpine yodel verse, a woman's full verse as his flatmate, furious] Grüezi, I'm the flatmate, and I'd like a word with you There's a bull inside the bathtub, and he's chewin' on my shoe I came home from a double, and the door was off the frame And the bull was watchin' cookin' shows and knew the chef by name You don't own a single meadow, you don't own a single fence You own one pair of burlap shorts and absolutely zero sense I pay half of every bill here, I've been patient, I've been nice But the bull is in my bedroom, and he's eatin' all the rice So you take him to the mountain, or you're both out on the street And I'm keepin' all the cowbells, and I'm keepin' all the meat [Hook: Alpine yodel male lead, full stomp, alphorn riff] Grabbed him by the horns, holadi, and I took the bull home Up the elevator, past the neighbors, down the hallway on my own Now he's eatin' all the houseplants, and he's sleepin' in my bed I took the bull by the horns, and now the bull is takin' me instead [Bridge: Alpine yodel male lead, yodel flip, chest to head on every holadi] So I walked him up the mountain on a Sunday, me and Mutz Past the chalets and the tourists and the cable cars and huts And I let him in the meadow, and he looked back once at me Like the city was a bad idea for both of us, you see Holadi, holadiri, now I visit every week And he's fatter than the mayor, and he's king of every peak And the flat is very quiet, and the houseplants all grew back And Vreni's got her bathtub, and she's cut me a little slack [Final Hook: Alpine yodel male lead, full stomp, alphorn riff] Grabbed him by the horns, holadi, and I took the bull home Up the elevator, past the neighbors, down the hallway on my own Now he's eatin' all the houseplants, and he's sleepin' in my bed I took the bull by the horns, and now the bull is takin' me instead [End]
