Woke up one morning, something wasn’t right, My wife was talking to a toaster all night. I said, “Hey babe, what’s going on?” She smiled at the fridge and called it John. We had a love like peanut butter and jam, But now she’s hanging with a slice of ham. Fentanyl’s got her on some wild new track, And I’m stuck here eating snacks and talking back. Fentanyl stole my spouse, Now she’s moonwalking around the house. Talking to plants, befriending the couch, While the cat’s just sitting there like “ouch.” It’s crazy, baby, where did you go? You’re in a spaceship, and I’m down below. She started a dance-off with a mop last week, Told me her toothbrush is very unique. Now she’s painting the walls in rainbow hues, And thinks the microwave is leaving clues. I love her still, but man, this is wild, She’s convinced she’s living like a 5-year-old child. I asked her, “Honey, can we just chill?” She handed me socks and called them Bill. Fentanyl stole my spouse, Now she’s moonwalking around the house. Talking to plants, befriending the couch, While the cat’s just sitting there like “ouch.” It’s crazy, baby, where did you go? You’re in a spaceship, and I’m down below. One night she made spaghetti with glue, Told me it’s a recipe from Peru. I said, “That’s not pasta!” She said, “Don’t care!” And tried to feed the rug its share. Fentanyl stole my spouse, Now she’s moonwalking around the house. Talking to plants, befriending the couch, While the cat’s just sitting there like “ouch.” It’s crazy, baby, what did you do? Now I’m eating cereal with a shoe! So here I am, left all alone, With a judgmental cat and a wobbly drone. Fentanyl stole my spouse, it’s true, But I guess I’m still here, and so are you!
