Néria - 1 - I Was Never Meant for the Ground by Nova_XXVI

[Intro]
I woke inside Astérya’s light, 
Flat on the stone, cut through with pain. 
The first thing that came back was sky, 
Too far to hold, too wide to name.

I raised my hand before a thought, 
Before my breath could settle down. 
All my life, they kept me low 
Beneath a shape that promised more than ground.

[Verse 1]
I came from Sélari soil, though I had never been.
They left me by the border water, small and hard to see.
A human home first took me in. I still call that a grace.
If they had wanted me gone for good, I would not have a face.

My wings came through when I was five. After that, doors stayed shut.
One day they said we’d take a walk. No joy was in their look.
They left me at an orphan gate. The children finished it.
The first time blood ran through my wings, I wished they weren’t on me.

They taught me how to hide my span,
To lace things shut, to lower my eyes,
To fold what should have met the air
Until it fit a smaller life.

[Pre-Chorus 1]
I wore my wings the way some wear
A mark they never asked to bear.
I learned to walk without taking space
And smile before they chose to stare.

After a while, I almost thought
That falling was all I was for,
That anything in me made for height
Would only be dragged back once more.

[Chorus]
Then you said yes and came with me.
No pity weighed the way you stayed.
You spoke to me like I was whole,
Not something bent, not something blamed.

You smiled at what I said out loud.
You laughed, and something changed in me.
You never looked at my dark wings
As if they were a wound to see.

[Verse 2]
You took me where the rooftops thinned,
Where colder wind ran clean and high.
The stars were not a distant ache.
They burned close enough to fill the sky.

For once my body and my heart
Both wanted one same thing at once.
The pull above, the pull in me,
Stopped fighting long enough to join.

Then my chest went hot, my thoughts went white.
I kissed your cheek before I knew.
It happened faster than my fright.

[Pre-Chorus 2]
Then all the heat rushed to my face.
My hands shook hard. I looked away.
I could not even trust my voice,

But I still wished that time would stay.

Once you have stood so near that height,
No later hurt can make it small.

[Chorus 2]
That was the hour I understood
You were the first my heart chose true,
And if it keeps one name for life,
There will be no name after you.

Not for soft dreams a child might keep,
Not for sweet words or being near.
I wanted strength enough to help,
To take from you what feeds your fear.

And when her light restored my wings
And drew new grace through ruined skin,

I did not think, “Now I can fly.”
I thought, “Now I can do more for him.”

[Bridge]
Then white pain tore the healing wide.
The strike came back more hard than before.

I did not think about my wings.
I thought, “Stay awake. Endure a little more.”

I felt your sorrow lose its shape,
Too sharp, too vast, too dark to name.
I would not let my failing body
Become one more blade for your pain.

So I bit down. I fought the blur.
I would not leave. I would not drown.
But pain is cruel, and blood is weak.
It took the light and pulled me down.

[Final Chorus]
When sight returned, she knelt by me.
Astérya’s hands were warm and sure.
My body hurt, but hers made it endure.

I looked for you before I moved.
Not seeing you cut deeper still.

Then I saw you crossing what remained,
And all at once my breath changed shape.
You were not wounded. Not in flesh.

But something in your face was gone.
As if the dark had passed through you
And left your features carrying on.
I did not think, He came back whole.
I thought, He came back here at all.

And when your eyes found where I lay,
I knew the sky was not the only height
The world had failed to pull me from.

[Outro]
I reached for heaven when I woke,
As if the answer lived above.

But when I saw you walking near
With that changed silence in your look,
I knew at once what stayed in me :
Not flight. Not stars. Not what was lost.

Only this wish, still sharp, still true
To take some part of that from you.
If I can still help call you back
From where your heart was forced to go,

Then even now, with ruined wings,
I was never meant for below.

4197/7500

[Intro] I woke inside Astérya’s light, Flat on the stone, cut through with pain. The first thing that came back was sky, Too far to hold, too wide to name. I raised my hand before a thought, Before my breath could settle down. All my life, they kept me low Beneath a shape that promised more than ground. [Verse 1] I came from Sélari soil, though I had never been. They left me by the border water, small and hard to see. A human home first took me in. I still call that a grace. If they had wanted me gone for good, I would not have a face. My wings came through when I was five. After that, doors stayed shut. One day they said we’d take a walk. No joy was in their look. They left me at an orphan gate. The children finished it. The first time blood ran through my wings, I wished they weren’t on me. They taught me how to hide my span, To lace things shut, to lower my eyes, To fold what should have met the air Until it fit a smaller life. [Pre-Chorus 1] I wore my wings the way some wear A mark they never asked to bear. I learned to walk without taking space And smile before they chose to stare. After a while, I almost thought That falling was all I was for, That anything in me made for height Would only be dragged back once more. [Chorus] Then you said yes and came with me. No pity weighed the way you stayed. You spoke to me like I was whole, Not something bent, not something blamed. You smiled at what I said out loud. You laughed, and something changed in me. You never looked at my dark wings As if they were a wound to see. [Verse 2] You took me where the rooftops thinned, Where colder wind ran clean and high. The stars were not a distant ache. They burned close enough to fill the sky. For once my body and my heart Both wanted one same thing at once. The pull above, the pull in me, Stopped fighting long enough to join. Then my chest went hot, my thoughts went white. I kissed your cheek before I knew. It happened faster than my fright. [Pre-Chorus 2] Then all the heat rushed to my face. My hands shook hard. I looked away. I could not even trust my voice, But I still wished that time would stay. Once you have stood so near that height, No later hurt can make it small. [Chorus 2] That was the hour I understood You were the first my heart chose true, And if it keeps one name for life, There will be no name after you. Not for soft dreams a child might keep, Not for sweet words or being near. I wanted strength enough to help, To take from you what feeds your fear. And when her light restored my wings And drew new grace through ruined skin, I did not think, “Now I can fly.” I thought, “Now I can do more for him.” [Bridge] Then white pain tore the healing wide. The strike came back more hard than before. I did not think about my wings. I thought, “Stay awake. Endure a little more.” I felt your sorrow lose its shape, Too sharp, too vast, too dark to name. I would not let my failing body Become one more blade for your pain. So I bit down. I fought the blur. I would not leave. I would not drown. But pain is cruel, and blood is weak. It took the light and pulled me down. [Final Chorus] When sight returned, she knelt by me. Astérya’s hands were warm and sure. My body hurt, but hers made it endure. I looked for you before I moved. Not seeing you cut deeper still. Then I saw you crossing what remained, And all at once my breath changed shape. You were not wounded. Not in flesh. But something in your face was gone. As if the dark had passed through you And left your features carrying on. I did not think, He came back whole. I thought, He came back here at all. And when your eyes found where I lay, I knew the sky was not the only height The world had failed to pull me from. [Outro] I reached for heaven when I woke, As if the answer lived above. But when I saw you walking near With that changed silence in your look, I knew at once what stayed in me : Not flight. Not stars. Not what was lost. Only this wish, still sharp, still true To take some part of that from you. If I can still help call you back From where your heart was forced to go, Then even now, with ruined wings, I was never meant for below.

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