Drunken Noodles (Remastered)

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I load up on lo mein, with my chopsticks in my hand.
The crab rangoon’s gone rubbery, the chickens learned how to fly a plane.
A spoon rests in the beef and broccoli like it paid rent here once.
Even the fortune cookies look kind of half-drunk and stoned.

[Chorus]
Nobody comes here now, not even by mistake,
The hostess chair just spins a little every time I take a plate.
The heat lamps hum like busted bees above the buffet row,
I’m eating with the memories and the memories forget my name.

Nobody comes here now, the windows got that gray,
I swear I hear the sneeze guard creak and talk about the day.
While the back of house is blasting the after party mix,
At this dead little buffet, I keep showing up again.

[Verse 2]
There’s one TV in the corner showing weather from last week,
The shrimp are in a metal pan and startin to wreak. 
I dip a nugget in the duck sauce, it slides off on my sleeve.
The waitress is on a folding chair, pretending not to breathe.

A Mop bucket by the soda machine looks like it knows my name.
The ice machine is rattling like it wants in on the game.
I toast the empty dining room with a sweating paper cup.
Then miss my mouth by half an inch and laugh until I hiccup.

[Bridge]
Some places are full for dinner,
Some places are doing great.
This one just keeps its lights on,
Like it’s still waiting on a stood up date.

[Chorus]
Nobody comes here now, not even by mistake
The hostess chair just spins a little every time I take a plate
The heat lamps hum like busted bees above the buffet row
I’m eating with the ghosts and the ghosts are eating slow

2039/7500

[Verse 1] I stumble in drunk and late to a Chinese buffet. Half the menu’s flipped over, like it couldn’t stay awake. The fish tank in the lobby has one sad plastic koi, And the carpet smells like fryer grease and old kimchi. I load up on lo mein, with my chopsticks in my hand. The crab rangoon’s gone rubbery, the chickens learned how to fly a plane. A spoon rests in the beef and broccoli like it paid rent here once. Even the fortune cookies look kind of half-drunk and stoned. [Chorus] Nobody comes here now, not even by mistake, The hostess chair just spins a little every time I take a plate. The heat lamps hum like busted bees above the buffet row, I’m eating with the memories and the memories forget my name. Nobody comes here now, the windows got that gray, I swear I hear the sneeze guard creak and talk about the day. While the back of house is blasting the after party mix, At this dead little buffet, I keep showing up again. [Verse 2] There’s one TV in the corner showing weather from last week, The shrimp are in a metal pan and startin to wreak. I dip a nugget in the duck sauce, it slides off on my sleeve. The waitress is on a folding chair, pretending not to breathe. A Mop bucket by the soda machine looks like it knows my name. The ice machine is rattling like it wants in on the game. I toast the empty dining room with a sweating paper cup. Then miss my mouth by half an inch and laugh until I hiccup. [Bridge] Some places are full for dinner, Some places are doing great. This one just keeps its lights on, Like it’s still waiting on a stood up date. [Chorus] Nobody comes here now, not even by mistake The hostess chair just spins a little every time I take a plate The heat lamps hum like busted bees above the buffet row I’m eating with the ghosts and the ghosts are eating slow Nobody comes here now, the windows got that gray, I swear I hear the sneeze guard creak and talk about the day. While the back of house is blasting the after party mix, At this dead little buffet, I keep showing up again.

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