I’m Donny T., the dealin’ dude, With towers tall and ties subdued, I tweet and tease, I twist and turn, Confessions now, it’s time to learn. Oh, I’m the king of cover-ups and cash, With secret stashes in a Mar-a-Lago stash, From Russia’s rubles to Ukraine’s calls, I’m rhyming all my “oopsies” in these gilded halls. I fiddled with the facts, I faked the stats, I hired hacks in fancy hats, I fired folks who frowned at fraud, And pardoned pals with just a nod. Alliteration’s awesome, ask my aides, They watched my wily, waffling charades, From phony phone calls, fake foundations, To hush-hush payments, wild vacations. Oh, I’m the sultan of subpoenas, The maestro of mistrials, My lawyers love my loopholes, My scandals stack in piles! I built a wall of waffle words, I juggled justice, jinxed the nerds, From emoluments to ethics, I did dance, With every chance, I took a glance—at France! Confessing now, with comic flair, To every caper, crime, and scare, From taxes dodged to tweets untamed, I’ll rhyme my way through all I’ve claimed. So here’s my funny, frank admission, A rhyme-filled, rollicking rendition, Of all the things I did (allegedly), Signed, sincerely, Donny T.
