[Intro- old fashion narrator voice] “…it’s known by many names: Marijuana, Jazz Cigarettes, the devils lettuce, but all too late you will know it…as a lifetime of addiction…” [beat drops] When I was a kid , if you had bud you were the man Smoking rope and seeds outta burnt up cola can It was the holy grail to grab whatever you could get Didn't matter if it was dried up or tasted like shit. Woke up last year, on April twenty-first, News blaring loud, “Marijuana laws reversed!” Dispensaries all open, lines running’ down the block, My pop’s in line looking like he’s there for Woodstock. [Verse 2] Finally got in the store and they all got brands everyware Fernway, Burnt out Betty, and Compassion Care A white guy with dreads said “Hey dude, nice to meet ya.” “My names Trey and I’ll be your pot barista. “ Nice to meet ya man. I know you heard this before. But I don’t even know where to start with this store Trey said, “Do you want indica? Sativa? Hybrid vapes?” “Dabs? Crystal? Gummies? THC sodas or cakes?” [Verse 3] Man, I didn’t do research and didn’t sign up for school. Just wanna giggle like an ass while watching YouTube. “Gotcha here’s something I always like to bake. “ “Cereal flavored Berry haze, Indica in a vape.” Brought it on home, got ready to get burnt Realized I didn’t even know how this thing worked Just a little plastic tube, I don’t see any buttons Do you just take a rip on this thing or something? [beat shift] [Verse 4] Took a huge hit, but didn’t feel nothing there Flew out a cloud so big I couldn’t see through the air Quickly checked to see where the packaging went And saw the THC levels were at 90% Room started tilting and my vision had stars Within five minutes, my ass was on Mars Started getting nervous. Can’t talk to anyone now. Words get stuck in my head before they get to my mouth [Verse 5] Zooted as fuck, put my buds in my ears I don’t need to have a conversation if I can’t hear. Tried to text my buddy, but I just stared at my phone, Forgot how thumbs work—So I left that shit alone. Tried to close my eyes and come back to Earth soon But the back of my eyelids were playing classic cartoons Bumping Sublime, fold laundry for, like hours Shit was never this strong when it was flower. [Verse 6 ] Woke up on the couch with a blanket of crumbs, Mouth dry as sand, heart beatin’ like drums. TV was still on, looping some nature show, about some kind of squids that are able to glow So next time I toke, I’m takin’ it slow, Startin’ with half… when giving it a go Took a deep breath, said, “Okay, lesson learned— This ain’t kid stuff, it’s what grown men burn.”. [outro- old fashion narrator voice from the beginning revived] [voice fades out] “Also known as Mary Jane, Giggle Smoke, Whacky tobaccy, Goof-Butts, Salt and Pepper, Jive, Rainy Day Woman, the sticky icky icky, and delicious chocolate Thai sticks…”
