Half

# **HALF** [VERSE 1] Half awake in every doorway, half convinced I should be gone. Half submerged beneath the moment, half performing I belong. Half a sentence held behind me, half the truth I never say. I keep exits in my pockets even when I want to stay. I ration joy before I feel it, measure love before it lands. Every time somebody holds me, part of me escapes their hands. [PRE-CHORUS] I became so good at leaving I could leave without a sound. Always almost giving in. Never letting myself drown. [CHORUS] **I keep one foot in the doorway, one eye fixed upon escape. I want everything completely, then retreat when it takes shape.** **I know how to almost love you. I know how to almost stay. I keep saving something for tomorrow— then I spend my life halfway.** **One foot in the doorway. One eye fixed upon escape. I keep waiting for a life to start while I’m living it halfway.** [VERSE 2] Half off-center, half off-script, half the man they think they know. I can wear a good impression while the undertow pulls low. Half instinct and half invention, half defense and half desire. I can warm myself beside you while I’m watching for the fire. I read silence like a warning. I read distance into touch. If I need a little less of you, losing you can’t hurt as much. That’s the bargain fear keeps making: keep the heart beneath control. Nothing gets to break you open if you never give it whole. [PRE-CHORUS] But protection has a price tag. Every shelter has a wall. If I never risk the ending, did I ever start at all? [CHORUS] **I keep one foot in the doorway, one eye fixed upon escape. I want everything completely, then retreat when it takes shape.** **I know how to almost love you. I know how to almost stay. I keep saving something for tomorrow— then I spend my life halfway.** **One foot in the doorway. One eye fixed upon escape. I keep waiting for a life to start while I’m living it halfway.** [POST-CHORUS] Halfway in. Halfway gone. Half the night with something wrong. Half a yes. Half a no. Close enough to never know. [VERSE 3] Half underwater when you touch me, half above it catching air. Even tenderness can scare me when it proves somebody’s there. I dissect the good while living it, search the sweetness for the sting. Turn a moment into evidence before it gets to mean a thing. I have loved with one hand open and the other on the door. Called it caution. Called it wisdom. Maybe I was simply scared of more. Because wanting makes you vulnerable. Being known removes disguise. You can’t lose what you refuse to hold— but nothing stays alive. [BRIDGE] What if safety is another word for slowly disappearing? What if all my careful distance never stopped what I was fearing? What if every piece I guarded, every feeling left unnamed, wasn’t something I was saving— just another thing I gave away? Maybe courage isn’t fearless. Maybe freedom isn’t flight. Maybe living means consenting to be changed by what feels right. Maybe nothing lasts forever. Maybe that was never the deal. Maybe being fully wounded beats being barely real. [BREAKDOWN] So take the exits. Take the alibis. Take the practiced little lies. Take the part of me that whispers: **“Leave before they change their mind.”** I have listened long enough. [FINAL CHORUS] **I had one foot in the doorway, one eye fixed upon escape. Wanted everything completely, then retreated when it took shape.** **I don’t want to almost love you. I don’t want to almost stay. If it matters, let it mark me. If it ends, I’ll bear the weight.** **No more waiting for tomorrow. No more bargaining with fate. I would rather lose something I lived than keep my whole life safe.** **One foot out became a lifetime. One more night became a chain. I kept waiting for my life to start—** **while I lived it halfway.** [OUTRO] Half awake. Half afraid. Half a heart kept safely saved. That was never safety. That was time I gave away.