The Plate Kraken

[Intro] (Chains… metal crashing… deep ocean horn) They say… If you hear plates clanging… But no one’s lifting… It’s already too late… THE KRAKEN HAS FED! ⸻ (Verse 1) Forty-fives stacked to the ceiling… Curl bar buried in the sea… Dumbbells vanished without warning… No one knows where they could be… Every squat rack left abandoned… Every bench a rusted throne… He doesn’t steal your workout… He simply claims it as his own… ⸻ (Pre-Chorus) You loaded it… You used it… Then walked away… Like nothing happened… ⸻ (CHORUS) THE PLATE KRAKEN! Dragging iron to the deep! THE PLATE KRAKEN! Leaving mountains no one keeps! Rack your plates! Respect the Forge! Leave no Brother stuck at war! THE PLATE KRAKEN!! WE WILL CLEAN… NO… MORE!! ⸻ (Verse 2) Leg press loaded… twenty plates… Nobody around for miles… Smith machine still fully racked… The Kraken always smiles… Cable towers wrapped in iron… Barbells sinking to the floor… Every set he leaves behind… Creates another chore… ⸻ (Breakdown) WHO… LEFT… THIS?! (BLEGH!) Who loads… Who leaves… Who runs away… Before the work is done?! Not… A… BROTHER!! ⸻ (Bridge) (Half-time, massive gang vocals) Iron isn’t treasure… Iron isn’t yours… Every plate belongs… To all within the Forge… Leave it… Better… Than you found… Or hear… The Kraken’s… CALL!! ⸻ (FINAL CHORUS) THE PLATE KRAKEN! He rises every night! THE PLATE KRAKEN! Hidden just outside your sight! Rack your iron! Lift with pride! Honor every Brother’s stride! THE PLATE KRAKEN! CAN’T… SURVIVE… WHEN… BROTHERS… CLEAN… THE… FORGE!! ⸻ (Outro) (Music stops except distant chains) Legend says… The Plate Kraken has only one weakness… A Brother… Who reracks… Every… Single… Plate.