[Verse 1] You came in grinning with a long, flat box, Said, “Honey, I found the thing your bathroom lacks.” I laughed and reached for the ribbon and bow, Then saw that little seat and said, “Well, bless my soul.” [Pre-Chorus] You know my coffee, you know my jeans, You even know my old back needs a little more ease. [Chorus] You gave me a bidet, darling, you know me so well, A throne-room upgrade with a warm-water spell. Now every morning feels like a first-class parade, I’ve never felt so loved as the day you gave me a bidet. [Verse 2] The cousins came over for Sunday lunch, I showed them the buttons—maybe a bit too much. You shook your head, but you couldn’t hide your smile, Said, “If he’s this happy, I’ll let him brag awhile.” [Pre-Chorus] You picked the perfect present, practical and sweet, A little touch of luxury right under my seat. [Chorus] You gave me a bidet, darling, you know me so well, A throne-room upgrade with a warm-water spell. Now every morning feels like a first-class parade, I’ve never felt so loved as the day you gave me a bidet. [Bridge] Some folks bring roses, some folks bring wine, You brought a little comfort, and you made it all mine. When the years roll on and the paint fades away, I’ll still be thanking you for that wonderful day. [Final Chorus] You gave me a bidet, darling, you know me so well, A throne-room upgrade with a warm-water spell. We’ll grow old together, let the whole world say: That’s a love built to last—and it started with a bidet. [Outro] Best gift I ever got, and I’m not ashamed to say, I love you more each morning… and your bidet.
