The Last Thing I Said

V5.5

Pre-Chorus
And I know I wasn’t perfect,
God knows you weren’t either,
But I never thought the words I said
Would be the words I’d grieve forever.

Chorus
’Cause I said, “I don’t want you anymore,”
And I meant it when I sent those words that night.
Thanksgiving came and you never walked through that door,
And I was angry, I was hurt, I was done with the fight.
Then Grandpa called the very next day,
Said they found you and you’d been taken away.
And I’ve spent all these years wondering if I made it happen somehow,
Like God heard what I said and took you from me right then and now.
If I could have one more minute,
I’d take back the last thing I said.

Verse 2
You were lying there beneath those hospital lights,
Machines breathing for you through the longest night.
Then came the infection, and we watched you fade,
And Mama and I had a choice no daughter should ever have to make.
We said goodbye while you couldn’t hear,
And I’ve carried that moment with me every single year.
I’ve asked God more times than I can count,
“Was it my fault? Did my words somehow count?”

Pre-Chorus
Maybe I was just a daughter
Who didn’t know how to say, “I’m hurt.”
Maybe I thought walking away
Would make the pain stop first.

Chorus
‘Cause I said, “I don’t want you anymore,”
And I’ve hated myself for those words ever since.
I wish I could’ve known what was waiting behind that door,
I wish I could’ve told you I was angry, not finished.
Then Grandpa called the very next day,
And suddenly forever had a different name.
And I’ve spent all these years wondering if I made it happen somehow,
Like God heard what I said and took you from me right then and now.
If I could have one more minute,
I’d take back the last thing I said.

Bridge
Dad, you’d have three grandbabies now,
And I know you’d be so proud somehow.
You’d have seen me leave that life that broke me down,
You’d have watched me find real love and finally turn my life around.
You’d sit beside Ruben on a Sunday afternoon,
Talking Texans football like only you two could do.
He’d hand you a plate of that barbecue he makes,
And I’d watch you smile while the whole table shakes.

And sometimes I find an old video,
And for just a second, you’re not gone.
I hear your laugh, I hear your voice,
And it feels like you came home.

Final Chorus
So I don’t want to say, “I don’t want you anymore,”
I want to say, “Dad, I wish you were here.”
I wish you’d seen the family standing by my door,
I wish you could’ve watched these babies grow up through the years.
I wish I’d known that goodbye was coming,
I would’ve found a thousand things worth saying.
And maybe God wasn’t punishing me,
Maybe losing you was never mine to blame.
You were already slipping away
Before I ever sent those words that day.

Outro
So Dad, if somehow you can hear me now,
I’m sorry for the things I said when I didn’t know how
To be your daughter and still protect my heart.
We had more bad days than good,
But that doesn’t mean I didn’t love you from the start.

And if heaven has a front porch,
I hope you’re sitting there tonight,
Watching over Mama, me, and those babies
Underneath those same old stars and lights.

I still wish you were here.
But I don’t blame myself anymore.

I love you, Dad.

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Verse 1 I grew up listening to slammed doors, Mama crying, Daddy wanting more, Some of my childhood’s burned into my mind, Two people fighting while I stood in between the lines. I tried to love the things that made you smile, Tried to find a way to meet you halfway for a while, But somehow every road we took Just led to another chapter I wish I could rewrite in this book. Pre-Chorus And I know I wasn’t perfect, God knows you weren’t either, But I never thought the words I said Would be the words I’d grieve forever. Chorus ’Cause I said, “I don’t want you anymore,” And I meant it when I sent those words that night. Thanksgiving came and you never walked through that door, And I was angry, I was hurt, I was done with the fight. Then Grandpa called the very next day, Said they found you and you’d been taken away. And I’ve spent all these years wondering if I made it happen somehow, Like God heard what I said and took you from me right then and now. If I could have one more minute, I’d take back the last thing I said. Verse 2 You were lying there beneath those hospital lights, Machines breathing for you through the longest night. Then came the infection, and we watched you fade, And Mama and I had a choice no daughter should ever have to make. We said goodbye while you couldn’t hear, And I’ve carried that moment with me every single year. I’ve asked God more times than I can count, “Was it my fault? Did my words somehow count?” Pre-Chorus Maybe I was just a daughter Who didn’t know how to say, “I’m hurt.” Maybe I thought walking away Would make the pain stop first. Chorus ‘Cause I said, “I don’t want you anymore,” And I’ve hated myself for those words ever since. I wish I could’ve known what was waiting behind that door, I wish I could’ve told you I was angry, not finished. Then Grandpa called the very next day, And suddenly forever had a different name. And I’ve spent all these years wondering if I made it happen somehow, Like God heard what I said and took you from me right then and now. If I could have one more minute, I’d take back the last thing I said. Bridge Dad, you’d have three grandbabies now, And I know you’d be so proud somehow. You’d have seen me leave that life that broke me down, You’d have watched me find real love and finally turn my life around. You’d sit beside Ruben on a Sunday afternoon, Talking Texans football like only you two could do. He’d hand you a plate of that barbecue he makes, And I’d watch you smile while the whole table shakes. And sometimes I find an old video, And for just a second, you’re not gone. I hear your laugh, I hear your voice, And it feels like you came home. Final Chorus So I don’t want to say, “I don’t want you anymore,” I want to say, “Dad, I wish you were here.” I wish you’d seen the family standing by my door, I wish you could’ve watched these babies grow up through the years. I wish I’d known that goodbye was coming, I would’ve found a thousand things worth saying. And maybe God wasn’t punishing me, Maybe losing you was never mine to blame. You were already slipping away Before I ever sent those words that day. Outro So Dad, if somehow you can hear me now, I’m sorry for the things I said when I didn’t know how To be your daughter and still protect my heart. We had more bad days than good, But that doesn’t mean I didn’t love you from the start. And if heaven has a front porch, I hope you’re sitting there tonight, Watching over Mama, me, and those babies Underneath those same old stars and lights. I still wish you were here. But I don’t blame myself anymore. I love you, Dad.

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