HE SAID HE HAD A FAMILY BUSINESS [INTRO — insects, wind, creaking door, generator hum; chainsaw sputters; silence; cheeky guitar; country-rock stomp, 112 BPM; female spoken, dry] Worked with his hands. Had a little land. Wanted me to meet his family. Mama said, “Finally—a man with a trade.” [VERSE 1 — conversational female; muted guitar, fiddle; insects] Met him at a gas stop, running low, Big quiet boy with a place down the road. Wore an apron, figured he could cook— Should’ve paid attention to the hooks. Picked up a hitchhiker thumbing a ride, He took my picture, then he pulled a knife. [CAMERA CLICK; METALLIC SCRAPE] Dropped him off, said, “That boy’s strange.” My date just waved. They had the same last name. [PRE — bass, kick; creaking floorboards, flies, rattling bones; suspicious vocal] Bone-white lamp by a curious chair, Something with teeth hanging over there. He reached behind that kitchen door— [CHAINSAW STARTS; MUSIC CUTS; DOOR SLAMS] [FEMALE SPOKEN] Well, that explains the decor. [CHORUS — full band; gritty female belt; fiddle, dirty guitar; distant saw between lines] Worst damn date I ever had, And I’ve had some competition. He brought a chainsaw to the porch— That clarified his intentions. I wanted sparks, I got a spark plug, Wanted butterflies, got chased. He could keep his family business— I was picking up the pace! [HOOK — stomp; catchy female call-and-response; footfalls, saw bursts] Run, girl, run! That ain’t the one! Meet the whole family? ONE AND DONE! Run, girl, run! Don’t look back! Ain’t enough pretty To put up with that! [VERSE 2 — bass, guitar; station bell, electrical buzz; breathless female] Ran to the gas stop, shaking like a leaf, Old man said, “Leave it all to me.” Thought I’d found somebody kind— Till he tied me up and took me back inside. [CLOCK TICKS; CUTLERY SCRAPES; CHAIR CREAKS] Dinner waiting, they saved me a seat, Nobody saying what was in the meat. Grandpa looked dead till he grabbed my hand— Learning too much about this family man. [PRE — heartbeat kick, low fiddle; wheezing; hammer taps metal pan; tense female] They put a hammer in Grandpa’s grip, Said he never used to miss. Held my head above that pan— [FULL STOP; ONE CLOCK TICK] [FEMALE SPOKEN] Retirement. Look into it. [CHORUS — wider guitars, harder drums; frantic female; bone rattles, mocking male laughter] Worst damn date I ever had, And I’ve had some competition. He brought a chainsaw to the porch— That clarified his intentions. I wanted sparks, I got a spark plug, Wanted butterflies, got chased. He could keep his family business— I was picking up the pace! [HOOK — louder female answers; rising fiddle; approaching footsteps] Run, girl, run! That ain’t the one! Meet the whole family? ONE AND DONE! Run, girl, run! Don’t look back! Ain’t enough pretty To put up with that! [BREAKDOWN — melody drains; slow toms; generator falters; low male chant echoes; chainsaw approaches] Burn her like a rat! Burn her like a rat! [CHANT CLOSER, LOUDER; METAL STRIKES; DISSONANT STRINGS] Burn her like a rat! Burn her like a rat! [DEAD SILENCE — TWO BEATS] [FEMALE SPOKEN — flat, disgusted] And y’all wonder why you’re single. [ESCAPE — chair crashes, glass shatters, running feet; explosive drums, fiddle, guitar] [VERSE 3 — urgent female; driving beat; dog barks; chainsaw behind her] Went through the window, dress and all, Left a little blood on the dining-room wall. Hit that dirt, got up and flew— He could keep my purse and the other shoe. Brother chasing, blade in his hand, Big rig coming like the promised land. Brother met the bumper, I cleared the lane— [TRUCK HORN; TIRE SQUEAL] Here came my date with that saw again. [BRIDGE — half-time; breathless female; pickup accelerates; saw recedes] A pickup slowed, I climbed in back, Screaming, “GO!” with my nails in the rack. Sun came up as we pulled away— He swung that saw, but I wasn’t gonna stay. [DRUMS DROP; WIND, ENGINE] [FEMALE SPOKEN] He’s from Texas. You can tell. [DISTANT SAW REV; GUITAR ANSWERS; DRUM FILL] [FINAL CHORUS — biggest groove; fierce female belt; female backing answers; rushing wind] Worst damn date I ever had, There ain’t no competition. He chased me clear to daylight— Still struggling with rejection. I wanted sparks, I got a spark plug, Wanted butterflies, got chased. Left him swinging in the sunrise— I was done with that first date! [FINAL HOOK — catchy female call-and-response; high fiddle, handclaps; saw fades] Run, girl, run! That ain’t the one! Meet the whole family? ONE AND DONE! Run, girl, run! Don’t look back! Ain’t enough pretty To put up with that! [STOP-START — kick, claps; female shouts] Run, girl, run! ONE AND DONE! Run, girl, run! THAT AIN’T THE ONE! [OUTRO — band cuts; pickup engine, shaky breathing; female spoken] Mama asked, “Will you see him again?” “Depends how fast this truck goes.” [GUITAR STAB; ENGINE FADES; INSECTS RETURN; DISTANT SAW SPUTTER; SILENCE]
