[Key: G Major with movement into E Minor] [Tempo: 176 BPM] [Time Signature: 4/4] --- [Intro] [soft acoustic guitar] [upright bass enters uncertainly] [distant fiddle drone] [floor tom with brushes] I was nine years old. Which is old enough to know words. And young enough to not understand them. --- [Verse 1] [acoustic strumming begins] [banjo enters quietly] I had a pellet gun that summer And nowhere important to be The woods behind our trailer Felt bigger than the world to me Everything looked permanent The creek, the grass, the trees I thought the world was built to last I thought nothing could leave And there was this bullfrog Sitting in the weeds Like he'd been there forever Like he'd signed a lease with God I don't remember aiming I remember wanting To see what happened Which is somehow worse --- [Pre-Chorus] [mandolin trembling] I thought mistakes were things Adults talked about I didn't know they could survive Inside your chest --- [Chorus] [gang vocals soft] I knew what "dead" meant I knew what "gone" was I knew what funerals were And why people cried But I didn't know what it felt like To be the reason For something leaving the world Before it wanted to And the worst part wasn't the sound Or the quiet afterward It was realizing The earth had noticed --- [Verse 2] [drums enter fully] [banjo picking harder] Nothing happened afterward No lightning strike No voice from heaven No lesson written in the clouds The afternoon kept moving The sun kept crossing overhead The trees kept being trees And I hated them for it Because something had changed And apparently Only I knew I sat beside the creek Trying to think backward Like maybe memory Could un-pull a trigger --- [Pre-Chorus] [bass and guitar only] I kept replaying it Like there was a version Where I walked away And both of us got older --- [Chorus] [louder] I knew what "dead" meant I knew what "gone" was But I didn't know how heavy A small thing could become I didn't know guilt Could follow you home Sit beside your bed And grow up with you And the worst part wasn't blood Or silence It was knowing I couldn't apologize --- [Breakdown] [bass and rim clicks] People talk about losing innocence Like somebody steals it Buddy Sometimes you shoot it And spend twenty years Trying to understand What exactly it was that died that day --- [Build] [snare pounding] [group humming] I was nine. I was stupid. I was curious. I was a child. I was careless. I was sorry. I am still sorry. --- [Final Chorus] [maximum release] [gang vocals huge] I knew what "dead" meant I knew what "gone" was But I didn't know life Could disappear that fast So I stopped thinking about aiming Like it was a game And started wondering What everything feels When it wakes up When it hurts When it fears When it dies And maybe that's the day I learned the world was real Because something smaller than me Had taught me how to grieve --- [Outro] [instruments falling apart] [banjo alone] I was nine years old. And a bullfrog taught me Something every funeral afterward Would eventually confirm. [last banjo strummed chord] [End]
