[Intro – Clean guitar, distant piano, gradually building distortion] I’ve spent my whole life running from a face I can’t forget, From the nights I lay awake and the words inside my head. I learned to call it healing when I buried it alive, But everything I pushed away was waiting deep inside. And now the silence sounds like screaming… [Verse 1 – Aggressive rhythmic vocals, distorted guitars] I was just a child when the world turned cold, Too young to understand, too scared to take control. I learned to read the room before I learned to read a page, To recognize the footsteps and prepare myself for rage. Every slammed door left a crack inside my chest, Every broken promise taught me love was just a test. I smiled for the pictures, kept the damage out of sight, Then cried into my pillow when nobody heard at night. [Pre-Chorus – Building tension, pounding drums] You say the past is over, so why won’t it let me sleep? Why do I still hear the voices that I buried six feet deep? I keep telling everybody that I’m finally doing fine, While the child I used to be is still screaming in my mind! [Chorus – High screams, melodic lead guitars] I’M NOT OKAY, I’M JUST GOOD AT PRETENDING! EVERY SCAR IS A STORY THAT NEVER FOUND AN ENDING! I BUILT THESE WALLS TO KEEP THE PAIN AWAY, BUT NOW I’M TRAPPED INSIDE THE HELL I MADE! IF TIME HEALS WOUNDS, WHY AM I STILL BLEEDING? WHY DOES EVERY MEMORY FEEL LIKE IT’S REPEATING? I KEEP SCREAMING FOR SOMEBODY TO SEE, THE BROKEN LITTLE BOY STILL LIVING INSIDE ME! [Verse 2 – Rapid-fire vocals, syncopated riffs] So pull up a chair, let’s talk about the damage, About the years I spent learning how to manage. The panic, the static, the automatic fear, The way my heartbeat races when somebody gets near. I don’t need another lecture about letting things go, From someone who was never there when I was down below. You call it holding grudges, I call it remembering, The difference between surviving and actually living. And every time I try to put the pieces back in place, I see another broken version staring through my face. [Breakdown 1 – Half-time, crushing low-tuned guitars] YOU WANT THE TRUTH? THEN LISTEN CLOSE! I WAS A CHILD! NOT A FUCKING GHOST! YOU SAW THE SIGNS! YOU HEARD THE CRIES! AND STILL YOU CHOSE TO CLOSE YOUR EYES! [Instrumental – Double-kick assault, dissonant guitar bends] I DIDN’T NEED A SAVIOR! I JUST NEEDED SOMEONE THERE! [Verse 3 – Spoken rhythmic delivery building into screams] Sometimes I wonder if the anger is all that’s left of me, If I stripped away the hatred, would there be anything to see? I don’t remember feeling safe, I remember feeling small, Like every single person had a reason not to call. Now I push away the people who are trying to get close, Because losing what I love is what I’ve always feared the most. And I hate that I became the very thing I used to fear, A man who hides behind his rage so no one sees his tears. [Pre-Chorus – Screamed, instruments gradually dropping out] I DON’T KNOW HOW TO HEAL! I ONLY KNOW HOW TO HIDE! AND EVERY TIME I SAY I’M FINE, ANOTHER PART OF ME DIES! [Chorus – Full instrumentation, layered screams] I’M NOT OKAY, I’M JUST GOOD AT PRETENDING! EVERY SCAR IS A STORY THAT NEVER FOUND AN ENDING! I BUILT THESE WALLS TO KEEP THE PAIN AWAY, BUT NOW I’M TRAPPED INSIDE THE HELL I MADE! IF TIME HEALS WOUNDS, WHY AM I STILL BLEEDING? WHY DOES EVERY MEMORY FEEL LIKE IT’S REPEATING? I KEEP SCREAMING FOR SOMEBODY TO SEE, THE BROKEN LITTLE BOY STILL LIVING INSIDE ME! [Bridge – Piano, restrained vocals turning into desperate screams] If I could sit beside the child I used to be, I’d tell him none of this was what he deserved to see. But how can I promise him the pain will disappear, When I’m standing here today still drowning in the fear? [Breakdown 2 – Silence, then explosive deathcore-influenced breakdown] I BURIED THE MEMORIES! BUT THEY BURIED ME! I LOCKED AWAY THE PAIN! AND THREW AWAY THE KEY! NOW EVERY FUCKING NIGHT! I HEAR THAT CHILD SCREAM! BEGGING ME TO WAKE UP FROM A NEVER-ENDING DREAM! [Extended instrumental – Slow, dissonant chugs, double-kick bursts] I CAN’T ERASE WHAT HAPPENED! I CAN’T UNDO THE YEARS! BUT I’M SICK OF LETTING YESTERDAY DECIDE WHO’S STANDING HERE! [Outro – Heavy guitars fading into a solitary piano] I spent my whole life hiding what I couldn’t understand, Trying to hold the pieces with a pair of shaking hands. And if you ask me whether all this pain has gone away, I’ll tell you I’m still breathing… But I don’t know if I’m okay. [Final piano note, abrupt silence]
