[INTRO] [NARRATOR] One book. Six hundred pages. Politics, breeding, religion, worms. [ENSEMBLE] How long? [NARRATOR] Four and a half minutes. [ENSEMBLE] Not enough time! [NARRATOR] Correct. Paul Uh-tray-deez, Jessica, Duke Leto, Move to Uh-rack-iss. [ENSEMBLE] The Emperor gave it to them! [NARRATOR] Seems nice. [beat] But not really. [VERSE 1] Uh-rack-iss makes the spice, meh-lonj, Most valuable thing known. It lengthens life, expands the mind, And gets the Spacing Guild home. Control the spice, control the stars. Before they came, House Har-cannon ran the planet. Now the Emperor fears Leto’s name. So he gives Leto Uh-rack-iss, Then lets Har-cannons attack With imperial Sar-dow-kar. [ENSEMBLE] So it’s a trap. [NARRATOR] Yes, try to keep track. [CHORUS 1] [ENSEMBLE] Boy goes to desert, Spice in the air, Dad gets a planet That’s obviously a snare! Worms in the sand, Enemies abound, Walk without rhythm Or the worm knows where you’re found! [NARRATOR] Simple? [ENSEMBLE] Yes! [NARRATOR] Enjoy that. [VERSE 2] There’s also the Benny Jess-er-it, A sisterhood with plans: Ten thousand years of breeding For one super-prescient man, The Kwee-satz Had-er-ack. Jessica was ordered, “Give Duke Leto daughters.” She had Paul. [ENSEMBLE] Why? [NARRATOR] Love. [ENSEMBLE] Reckless. [NARRATOR] Catastrophically. Paul has visions, passes The Gom Jah-bar pain test. And the Freemen prophecies? Benny Jess-er-it planted myths So stranded sisters could use them. [ENSEMBLE] Important! [NARRATOR] VERY. Doctor You-ee betrays the Duke. [ENSEMBLE] Why!?!?! [NARRATOR] The doctor's wife. Har-cannons have her hidden under threat of torture. Sar-dow-kar take the city. Duke Leto tries a poisoned tooth to kill the Baron. He misses. Duke Leto dies! [CHORUS 2] [ENSEMBLE] TRAP CONFIRMED! DUKE LETO IS DEAD! HAR-CANNONS WON, SAR-DOW-KAR LED! BREEDING PLAN! PROPHECY TOO! TEN THOUSAND YEARS MAY END WITH PAUL COMING TRUE! [ENSEMBLE] Can you slow down? [NARRATOR] We’re already running behind! [VERSE 3 - faster] [NARRATOR] Paul and Jessica escape. Meet Freemen. Paul fights Jamis. Paul kills Jamis. Jessica drinks Water of Life. [ENSEMBLE] What’s that? [NARRATOR] Worm poison. [ENSEMBLE] Explain! [NARRATOR] Sorry, no time! Paul's sister Ah-lee-ah wakes With ancestral memories. Paul becomes Moo-ah-deeb, Falls for Chah-nee, Learns Freemen warfare, Rides a sandworm. [ENSEMBLE] HE RIDES A WORM? [NARRATOR] Yes, moving on. Spice expands his visions. He sees a galaxy-wide holy war Fought in his name. [ENSEMBLE] So he stops it? [NARRATOR] He’s working on it. [CHORUS 3] [ENSEMBLE] JESSICA CHANGED! AH-LEE-AH WOKE! CHAH-NEE! MOO-AH-DEEB! AND A VERY LARGE WORM! FUTURE IN SIGHT! HOLY WAR NEAR! HE’S BECOMING THEIR MESSIAH, WHICH IS EXACTLY WHAT HE FEARS! [NARRATOR] How am I on time? [ENSEMBLE] Not great. [NARRATOR] Two years pass! [VERSE 4] Paul leads Freemen raids. Spice production crashes. Baron uses brutal Rabban, Plans to swap in his nephew Fade-Row-tha Har-cannon. The Emperor comes personally. Bad move. Paul drinks the Water of Life. [ENSEMBLE] MORE POISON?! [NARRATOR] Concentrated! Three weeks unconscious, Then he wakes seeing past, future, Male and female memory. [ENSEMBLE] Kwee-satz Had-er-ack! [NARRATOR] Now Paul can destroy The spice cycle completely. [ENSEMBLE] So he can wreck civilization? [NARRATOR] That’s leverage. [FINAL BUILD] The Emperor lands. Sar-dow-kar gather. Sandstorm hits. Paul uses atomics To blast the Shield Wall. [ENSEMBLE] NUKES?! [NARRATOR] Against the wall, technically. [ENSEMBLE] Legal? [NARRATOR] FEUDAL SPACE LAW! Freemen ride worms through, Crush Sar-dow-kar, Capture the Emperor. Paul's Sister Ah-lee-ah, Kills Baron Har-cannon [ENSEMBLE] We’re skipping things! [NARRATOR] LOTS OF THINGS! [FINAL CHORUS] [ENSEMBLE] SPICE MARKET CRASH! EMPEROR IS TRAPPED! WORMS THROUGH THE WALL IMPERIAL ARMY GETS SCRAPPED! AH-LEE-AH KILLS BARON! PAUL DRINKS WATER OF LIFE! NOW HE SEES THE FUTURE! BUT IT'S NOT FULLY BRIGHT! [FINALE] Fade-Row-tha Har-cannon challenges Paul. Paul kills Fade. Paul tells the Emperor: Abdicate. He’ll marry Princess Ear-oo-lahn To secure his claim. [ENSEMBLE] But Chah-nee? [NARRATOR] Real partner. Political marriage. Paul threatens to destroy the spice. Guild backs down. Great Houses back down. Emperor backs down. [Angelic Choir] Paul Uh-tray-deez becomes Emperor. [ENSEMBLE] So he wins And stops the holy war! [music cuts] [NARRATOR] Not Exactly. The Freemen worship him. His legend’s out of control. The jihad he’s seen all book Is now effectively inevitable. [ENSEMBLE] So he wins the planet, War, throne, spice, Becomes messiah, And that’s bad? [NARRATOR] That’s Dune. [CODA - full recap, very fast] [ENSEMBLE] DESERT! SPICE! WORMS! THE GUILD! HAR-CANNONS! FREEMEN! PROPHECIES FULFILLED! POISON! PRESCIENCE! MOO-AH-DEEB WINS! TEN THOUSAND YEARS OF BREEDING AND THE HOLY WAR BEGINS! [NARRATOR] Four and a half minutes? [ENSEMBLE] Yes! [NARRATOR] Good.
