Crisis Hotline (But Make It Fun)
(Verse 1) I woke up late again, forgot my name, whoops Checked my phone—three texts, existential doom hits I should probably eat, but I can’t decide Between last night’s pizza or another existential crisis (Pre-Chorus) My rent’s due, my plants died, my screen time’s unhealthy Tried to meditate but my brain won’t let me Maybe I should call my mom (ehhh…) Or just spiral alone with a discount coupon (Chorus) Oh, I’m fine, totally fine Just pacing the room at 3:09 Googling “How to be chill and mysterious” While my life’s on fire, but make it delirious Oh no, it’s cool, don’t worry about me Just vibing with my quarter-life catastrophe Put me on hold—Crisis Hotline’s busy Guess I’ll just dance ‘til I stop feeling dizzy (Verse 2) Therapist said, “Try journaling your thoughts” But my diary’s just memes and coffee stains, oops Got a to-do list from four weeks ago Crossed off “make list” and called it personal growth (Pre-Chorus) My fridge light’s out, my car makes weird noises Debt’s stacking up like it’s one of my choices Maybe I should touch some grass But I’d probably just overthink that too fast (Chorus) Oh, I’m fine, totally fine Just pacing the room at 3:09 Googling “How to be chill and mysterious” While my life’s on fire, but make it delirious Oh no, it’s cool, don’t worry about me Just vibing with my quarter-life catastrophe Put me on hold—Crisis Hotline’s busy Guess I’ll just dance ‘til I stop feeling dizzy (Bridge - soft, introspective moment) Maybe I’m dramatic, maybe I’m just tired Maybe I should start drinking water more Maybe it’s the caffeine, maybe it’s the pressure Or maybe this is just adulthood’s core (Chorus - more chaotic, energetic) Oh, I’m fine, totally fine Just screaming at YouTube meditations online Googling “Can anxiety count as cardio?” While my brain’s short-circuiting like a Mario Oh no, it’s cool, don’t worry about me Just thriving in a state of catastrophe Put me on hold—Crisis Hotline’s busy Guess I’ll just dance ‘til I stop feeling dizzy (Outro - spoken, playful fade-out) “Hi, thanks for calling Life Support. Your estimated wait time is… forever.”
