Where Are My Glasses?

[Verse 1: Funky, upbeat with punchy synths] Was it the fridge? Was it the couch? I swear I just had 'em in my pouch. Did I leave 'em on the counter or the car dash? Now I’m walkin’ through the house like a game of Flash. [Pre-Chorus: Builds with cascading drum machine] Check the sink, check the shelf, I’m not crazy, just myself. Tearing up the place for some clarity, This is middle-age hilarity! [Chorus: Anthemic, big power chords] Where are my glasses? (Oh no, oh no!) I need my glasses! (Let’s go, let’s go!) I can’t read my phone, can’t drive my car, Midlife meltdown, I’ve gone too far. [Verse 2: Adds a groovy bassline] Kids roll their eyes, “Mom, it’s on your face.” I check the mirror—there’s no trace. Found my phone, found the keys, found last week’s snack, But my bifocals? Still lost in the black. [Pre-Chorus: Faster, playful energy] Check the drawer, check my hair, Found a scrunchie but they’re not there. Tearing up the house like an old-school spy, Is this the end for my eagle eyes? [Chorus: Bigger, layered harmonies] Where are my glasses? (Oh no, oh no!) I need my glasses! (Let’s go, let’s go!) I can’t see my texts, can’t microwave, Blind as a bat, but still feel brave. [Bridge: Nostalgic, emotional synth ballad vibes] Remember when we danced till dawn? Didn’t care what we had on. Now I’m here with a magnifying lens, Calling out my readers like they’re old friends. [Breakdown: Spoken, sarcastic tone with a funky beat] “Lila, they’re on your head.” (Sighs) “Oh, well, that’s what I said.” Maybe this is just the way it’s gonna be, Who needs vision? I’ve got 20/20 irony. [Final Chorus: Euphoric, handclaps, and key change!] Found my glasses! (Hallelujah!) Saved my classes! (Thank ya, Buddha!) I can see the screen, I can read my books, Still rockin’ these frames with my Gen X looks! [Outro: Synth fade, playful hum] Do-do-do, do-do-do-doo... Where are my keys now? Oh no, oh no... [Instrumental Outro] [End]