(Verse 1) Yo, lemme tell you 'bout this toaster, right? Bought it online, yeah, looked alright. Arrived in bits, like a cursed artifact Now I'm stuck dealin' with this cosmic shaft. Packed it back up, followed all the rules But the return address? Ancient Carcosa, fools. (Pre-Chorus) Hold music soundin' like shoggoth cries Customer service portal got cyclopean eyes Waitin' on the line, feelin' my sanity fray This ain't just a toaster, this is where hope goes to decay. (Chorus) Got the receipt, wrong dimension store [metatag: distorted clarinet riff] Warranty voided by the eldritch horror? Call center chaos, hold music insane Tryna return this toaster drivin' me profane! (Verse 2) Clickin' through portals, speakin' in tongues Agent Azathoth, keepin' me strung. "Seven business aeons," that's what he said This toaster's from R'lyeh, I shoulda stayed in bed. They askin' for chants, and blood sacrifice Just to get a refund, payin' the cosmic price. (Pre-Chorus) Hold music soundin' like shoggoth cries Customer service portal got cyclopean eyes Waitin' on the line, feelin' my sanity fray This ain't just a toaster, this is where hope goes to decay. (Chorus) Got the receipt, wrong dimension store [metatag: distorted clarinet riff] Warranty voided by the eldritch horror? Call center chaos, hold music insane Tryna return this toaster drivin' me profane! (Bridge) [metatag: Tempo slows, beat becomes more disjointed] Yo, they sent a courier, tentacles and all Said I gotta sign a pact, standin' in the hall. This ain't no refund, this is a damn curse Think I'm tradin' my soul for a verse. (Chorus) Got the receipt, wrong dimension store [metatag: distorted clarinet riff] Warranty voided by the eldritch horror? Call center chaos, hold music insane Tryna return this toaster drivin' me profane! (Outro) [metatag: Beat drops out, only distorted clarinet riff remains] Yo, this toaster… [sound: final, heavily distorted clarinet note] Word. [Outro] [metatag: Beat drops out, only distorted clarinet riff remains] Yo, this toaster… [sound: final, heavily distorted clarinet note] Word.