Country Problems

[Intro drunk slurred spoken stand-up comedy, Cleetus:] Hey fellers, do you know why nobody liked the terrorist joke? Because it bombed! [Audience:] BOOOOH! [Cleetus:] Whatever… [Verse] Wake up in the morning and take a swig Yes that's a winner's breakfast For me... [Verse] I take a stroll In my backyard And chug some booze Yes that's a healthy habit At least for me... [Chorus] I'll be sipping on moonshine As long as the sun shines I may be a loser for you all But I'm a winner in my mind Yes a winner in my mind [Verse] Wish you were here Feel kinda blue Because I miss you But I got beer That's better than you (Better for me...) [Verse] My lady left me My boss just fired me I'm all alone But I've still fire in my veins Yes folks whiskey is enough for me Enough for me... [Chorus] I'll be sipping on moonshine As long as the sun shines I may be a loser for you all But I'm a winner in my mind Yes a winner in my mind [Verse] You can call me "Booze" Yes I'm Alcoholics Synonimous (Get it?) Chug it down! Here we go, Jeronimo! Don't do what I do 'Cause maybe it's true Drink's bad for you But good for me So good for me... [Verse] Yes the truth is hard to swallow But liquor's as easy as easy goes So I'll just keep on drinking hard With half a liver and a broken heart But don't do like I do You play your part Drink's bad for you But good for me Yes drink's good enough for me... [Chorus] I'll be sipping on moonshine As long as the sun shines I may be a loser for you all But I'm a winner in my mind Yes a winner in my mind [Bridge] I trusted you I was a believer But then you left me So now I'm killing my liver Yeah go with your new man I hope you'll be happy I'll stay here alone Me and my DT that makes me shiver Well I still got my juice Don't need your stinky ass beaver [Chorus] I'll be sipping on moonshine As long as the sun shines I may be a loser for you all But I'm a winner in my mind Yes a winner in my mind [Chorus] I'll be sipping on moonshine (mooonshiiine) As long as the sun shines (suuuun shiiiines) I may be a loser for you all But I'm a winner in my mind Yes I'm a winner in my own mind Yeeeee....haaaaah! [End]