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Comma Sutra

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June 4, 2025 at 2:19 AMv4.5

[Intro – Whispered] Mmm… I like my sentences like I like my lovers… Well-structured. Punctuated. And down to do me right. --- [Verse 1 – Noun Down, Verb Me Up] Baby, I’m the subject, get on my predicate, Proper like a noun with that capital etiquette. You bring the verb, I’ll bring the tense, Make my clause complex, don’t talk in past sense. I like my pronouns hot — he, she, they, I’ll take ‘em all, long as they slay. Don’t dangle that modifier, babe, Unless you gonna finish what you say. --- [Pre-Chorus – Slay the Sentence] Spank me with a semicolon (;), Pause me with a dash (—), Put your period on me, daddy, Let’s make this sentence clash. --- [Chorus – Comma Sutra] Comma Sutra, teach me slow, Where the pause and where it go. I’m a freak for grammar play, Oxford comma all the way. Ooh! Quote me right, don’t miss the mark, “Apostrophe’s” possessive spark. Spell me, thrill me, diagram me— Grammar slut, and proud to be! --- [Verse 2 – Tense Me, Babe] Past perfect? Nah, I live in the now, Future progressive got me raising a brow. Lay me down or lie with me? Conjugate it right and set me free. I’ll split that infinitive (to boldly come), I’ll preposition anywhere — under, over, some. Your grammar game is turning me on, Spell-check me, daddy, ‘til the break of dawn. --- [Bridge – Dirty Little Rules] Don’t you mix up “your” and “you’re,” Or I’m walking out the door. “There,” “their,” “they’re,” oh yes please, Grammar gangbang, triple tease. “Who” do you love? “Whom” do you want? Let's parse this sentence like a debutante. --- [Chorus – Comma Sutra] Comma Sutra, bend and learn, Periods drip and brackets burn. I’ll exclaim! (!) You interrogate? (?) Together we punctuate our fate. Ooh! Quote me right, don’t miss the mark, “Apostrophe’s” possessive spark. Spell me, thrill me, diagram me— Grammar slut, and proud to be! --- [Outro – Whispered, Moaning] Teach me... the difference between affect and effect. Make me beg for subjunctive. Correct me harder. Ughhh… I’m such a run-on.

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