Ballad of Bold Bertrand

[Intro] Yo, gather 'round, let the lutes play, We're diving deep into the fray, Of a peasant's life, in the medieval bay, Where the absurd's everyday, okay? [Verse 1] In my village, life's a jest, Bathing once a year, we're feeling blessed, Witches next door, on trial, they confess, Broomsticks flying, it's a mess, no rest. Turnips for dinner, breakfast, and lunch, A lord's feast, on rats, we munch, Ale's our water, we drink it in a bunch, Plague doctors dancing, a creepy brunch. [Chorus] In the medieval, it's survival, no rehearsal, Jousting on the daily, life's a wild carousel, Peasants like me, living the fable, In a world, so unstable, but we're able. [Verse 2] Got a cow, named her Lady Fair, She dances at night, in the moonlit square, Sold my teeth, for a coin, to spare, Bought a magic potion, bald no more, got hair. My neighbor claims he’s a dragon’s kin, Breathes fire when he drinks gin, Our king married a frog, says it’s no sin, The court jester’s the only one with a real grin. [Chorus] In the medieval, it’s a wild ride, no denial, Sword fights in the streets, for a trial, Living through a curse, with a smile, In this time, so versatile, we’re agile. [Chorus] In the medieval, it's survival, no rehearsal, Jousting on the daily, life's a wild carousel, Peasants like me, living the fable, In a world, so unstable, but we're able. [Verse 3] Last week, saw a knight, duel the wind, Claimed it whispered, called him "chicken-skinned", Our priest worships cheese, says it's divined, Held a sermon 'bout the holy rind, we're pinned. Festivals where we all pretend to be dead, To scare away the spirits, the flyer read, Moon's our lamp, sun's our dread, Life's a jest, on absurdity, we're fed. [Bridge] Hear ye, hear ye, in the tavern's glow, Tales of our lives, in the ale, they flow, From the highest lord to the lowest crow, In the medieval times, we reap what we sow. [Chorus] In the medieval, it's survival, no rehearsal, Jousting on the daily, life's a wild carousel, Peasants like me, living the fable, In a world, so unstable, but we're able. [Outro] So here's the tale, of my medieval spree, A peasant's life, wild and free, Absurd, yes, but listen to my plea, Wouldn't change a thing, in this history. Beware, the past's a different dimension, Filled with tales too wild to mention, But in this song, we sought attention, To the medieval life, an absurd convention. [Chorus] In the medieval, it's survival, no rehearsal, Jousting on the daily, life's a wild carousel, Peasants like me, living the fable, In a world, so unstable, but we're able. [Outro] So here's the tale, of my medieval spree, A peasant's life, wild and free, Absurd, yes, but listen to my plea, Wouldn't change a thing, in this history. Beware, the past's a different dimension, Filled with tales too wild to mention, But in this song, we sought attention, To the medieval life, an absurd convention.