Big Bertha

[Guitar intro] [Verse 1] She was bucked tooth, forsooth, dirty hair everywhere, black eyes and black flies floating around her, a crooked nose with broken bones, yellow teeth and bowed feet. [Verse 2] Her voice was like gravel, bounced with her Adams apple, she had seen her doctor, he thought she was a monster, her chest was flat and her arms were fat. [Chorus] She was the ugliest woman I ever did see, if I could I would kill that memory. [Verse 3] She smelled like a sow and moved like a cow, she could break your mind and you'd prey to be blind, she could not understand why I would demand, that there was an open window when I could see her toes. [Chorus] She was the ugliest woman I ever did see, if I could I would kill that memory. [Bridge break down] After a few drinks she was all that I need, she was ugly and real good at rugby, Big Bertha come back to me. Big Bertha come back to me. [End]